All tastes are found in nature. Including when it comes to sex toys, and that’s a good thing. But sometimes, in the winding alleys of the internet, we stumble upon sex toys whose look leaves us rather perplexed. Here is a small sample of creepy sex toys freshly gathered.
The anal dwarf, Snow White’s creepy sex toy?
The anal dwarf, this pernicious creature of a sizeable diameter, will slip into your anus while you sing “he ho! he ho!” to it.
Now we understand why Snow White ran off.
For the lewd gardeners who need a little hat tip.
The plug featuring the infant Jesus
I find it hard to say what’s most disturbing about the “Baby Jesus Butt Plug”: whether it’s shaped like Jesus, or shaped like a baby.
Divine-interventions offers a collection of sex toys that are as creepy as you like, but supremely original.
For the necrophiles and fans of The Exorcist, a crucified Jesus G-spot toy is also available. Otherwise, still in the Catholic register, there is also a Virgin Mary G-spot toy, not ugly at all, but rather strange as a sex toy, a nun, the devil, and a Bible.
But the brand also targets other religions, with a Buddha G-spot toy, with rather disturbing chubby baby vibes, and an egg-shaped Shiva vibrator. The reaper has also been given a sex toy in her image, a morbid phallic object representing a hooded skull-headed silhouette.
All these creepy sex toys featuring Obama…
Given the many sex toys featuring the American president available online, I’d deduce there must be a certain demand. And not merely as an item one buys to make a good, quite dirty joke, given the attention paid to product quality.
The Obamarator is a vibrator, officially intended for back, neck and shoulder massages. But its description nevertheless specifies that, being hygienic and phthalate-free, it is suitable even for the most intimate parts of the body.
The doll “Blow up Barack” is an inflatable doll equipped with a “presidential-sized power-tool”.
The Head O State is a non-vibrating dildo, available in two colours: “democratic blue” and “presidential gold”. It has the slogan “You love your candidate, let him love you back!”. Which means: “you love your candidate, let him love you back!”.
It is phthalate-free, waterproof, and, above all, made in the USA… Which must be the essential point for buyers who take American patriotism so… deeply.
Supporter’s geisha balls
You’re dating a supporter? He’s so romantic when he takes you to the stadium in his car, from whose rear-view mirror proudly hangs a blue-white-red football-shaped air freshener ?
At the end of the match, catch his attention with these geisha balls with a thoroughly appropriate look. Well, appropriate, only if his team has won, because otherwise he will probably send you packing rather rudely. If that doesn’t work, you’ll have to make do with the effect provided by the balls when you’ve been bouncing around the stands… Or when you’ve stood up to bring beers.
Creepy sex toys: the sweatshirt that gives you the creeps
Ideal for going out to kidnap young girls on rainy evenings, this sweatshirt resists mud stains and blood splatters.
Just imagine your mother’s joy at no longer seeing you coming home covered in soiled clothes! Maybe she’ll even stop forcing you to wear that disgusting nappy you despise so much…
For sale on Dèmonia.
The matching axe is unfortunately not included.
