As every winter, the Lovehoney shop releases a sex toy advent calendar. This year, they’ve even put out four: a version for couples, one for men, one for women, and a “weekly” one containing women’s lingerie.
Having the opportunity to test one of them, we opted for the naughty “Best Sex of Your Life” calendar, which is aimed at straight couples. Concretely, this means that some of the sex toys it contains require a penis, and others, a vagina.
This sexy advent calendar contains twenty-four erotic surprises, to be discovered day by day in the company of your partner, from the first to the twenty-fourth of December. Between sex toys, erotic cosmetics and soft BDSM accessories, there’s enough here to build yourself a rather nifty little kit for playing about as adults under the tree.
Here’s our review of the Lovehoney “Best Sex of Your Life” sex toy advent calendar.
Introduction to the Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar
The packaging of a sex toy isn’t always essential. But when you choose an advent calendar, let’s face it, it’s often almost as much for the fun aspect of this super box full of discoveries as for what it contains. Sure, here the contents are much more fun than chocolate. But it’s an object that’s generally bought to give to your partner, so the presentation matters.
The Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar is beautiful, and big. It sports the colours of Christmas, red, gold, and a little white.
From the outside, nothing gives a hint of what’s inside, unless you recognise the heart-shaped logo of the shop. But of course, you’ll still need to be careful not to leave it within reach of children. They might think you’re incredibly selfish for gobbling up all those giant chocolates in the corner without sharing, and would risk taking a peek under the next compartments to see what you’re hiding in there.
Even though it’s very pretty, this calendar remains disposable once all the surprises have been discovered. You might fancy keeping it around for a few more days among the Christmas decorations, but you’ll inevitably end up binning it (keeping the contents, of course). It’s made entirely of cardboard, and is therefore recyclable.
Contents of the Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar
The Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar therefore hides behind its doors no fewer than twenty-four naughty items. Among them, massage products, adult games, soft BDSM accessories, and of course, sex toys.
Before moving on to the unboxing: watch out, if you want to keep the surprise intact, the following paragraph contains spoilers about the contents of the calendar. But for my part, I’m wary of surprises. In order to determine whether this calendar will suit your practices and your shared desires, and to better broach the subject with your partner if you’re considering a first experience, it’s best to inform yourself about its contents. Scroll straight through to the conclusion if you’d rather not know.
Lovehoney naughty advent calendar: the massage products
Fancy some softness and relaxation? For voluptuous caresses in a duo, the Lovehoney calendar provides an oil and a massage candle, as well as a pretty little star-shaped accessory for massaging the back. Well, it’s the kind of classic thing you often find in naughty boxes, but we appreciate the idea of having put it all in Christmas colours.
The ingredients of the candle: soy wax, fragrance. And that’s it.
Those of the oil: ethylhexyl palmitate, caprylic/capric triglyceride, isopropyl myristate, fragrance. Only components with not a shred of risk to the body.
On the cosmetics side, there’s also an orgasm balm, which can be applied directly to the clit or the glans, or used as a lip balm before oral sex. It’s a mentholated product, containing numerous essential oils, but also, alas, propylparaben.
The adult games in the Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar
In this calendar, you’ll also find two adult games. A pair of naughty dice, and cards illustrating various Kama Sutra positions, with their difficulty level. The cards are rather pretty, however, watch out, they’re in English. In any case, they’re much better than the unscratchable scratch cards from the previous calendar that we’d unboxed.
Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar: the BDSM accessories
The BDSM accessories in this calendar are particularly cute. Well, it’s true that we’re not in the “built to withstand all, ideal for equipping a dungeon” register. It’s soft, very soft even. Which is perfectly logical and normal: they’re surprises, and their purpose is to please everyone, not to put people face to face with a fantasy that’s too hardcore for them without any warning.
You’ll find:
- A pair of adjustable nipple clamps, which can be adjusted so they don’t squeeze too hard.
- A pretty blindfold.
- Two ribbons in satin, for gently tying hands and feet.
- A little paddle in fabric and faux leather, very cute. Among the surprises in the calendar, it’s far from being the most expensive item, but it’s the one I find the prettiest. Unfortunately, it went missing during the photo shoot, but here it is a little later on Instagram.
The clamps, the blindfold and the paddle are in red and gold tones, with stars and hearts. Everything is matched and Christmas-themed, which is a nice touch.
The sex toys in the Lovehoney naughty advent calendar
As its name suggests, this calendar contains a whole bunch of sex toys. If you already own a few, it’s possible that some of the items you’ll discover in it are already part of your collection. But if you’re new to sex toys as a couple, it’s an excellent opportunity to experiment together with a load of nifty things, without breaking the bank, with a wide variety of choices depending on your shared desires of the moment.
On the first of December, we discover a “bullet”-type vibrator. A small cylindrical gadget, in a metallic red, also matched with the tree. Good surprise: this one is rechargeable, thanks to a USB cable included, and quite powerful. It combines with some of the accessories we’ll discover later: a cockring fitted with two rabbit ears, an anal plug, an anal bead chain, and a small hollow flat-based dildo.
There’s also a small Rosebuds-style anal plug, gold with a red rhinestone. The quality is much cheaper, of course, budget permitting, but it’s still pretty and nice to use.
For penises, the calendar contains a transparent sleeve in elastomer, a small masturbator that’s plush with two rows of beads, and a Tenga-style egg, textured on the inside, but without the shell. A bit like a soft-boiled egg, in a way. You’ll also come across a minimalist cockring, and a decorative fabric ring that allows you to dress up Willy as Rudolph the Reindeer… Original and cute, and you had to be brave to pull it off!
There’s also a pair of silicone geisha balls, rather nice, and a small battery-operated insertable vibrator.
And finally, the highlight, for the twenty-fourth of December, the Womanizer Classic, a suction vibrator that’s genuinely brilliant. If you hear a noise in your bedroom during the night, you can always say it’s the Father Christmas.
Conclusion on the Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar
Sure, the naughty accessories contained in this calendar don’t all constitute the top of the mega-luxury in their category. But it allows you to get a varied collection of twenty-four sex toys, BDSM toys and erotic cosmetics, for only 135 euros, that’s less than 6 euros per item. And there’s plenty here to experiment in all areas of naughtiness…
If you’re in a couple, and want to treat yourself for Christmas to a lovely discovery of the world of sex toys and naughty games together, the Lovehoney sex toy advent calendar is an excellent opportunity to spend the month of December in seventh heaven. And, incidentally, a superb gift to give your partner so you can enjoy it together.
