Here is the sixth edition of the Sex Toy Gazette, with some problems of hackable connected sex toys, smart love dolls and godemichets to open your chakras.
Hacking connected sex toys and personal data
The Svakom Siime Eye, an endoscopic vibro camera, successor to the Gaga, would be far too easy to hack. One consolation: if the image is as blurry as that of the Gaga, the perverse hacker will not have much to chew on.
Meanwhile, the sex toy brand We Vibe has been ordered to pay its clients the sum of 4 million Canadian dollars for having collected personal data without informing users of it, with its connected sex toy, the We Vibe 4 Plus.
A “smart” condom
The i.Con, by British Condoms is a smart condom. Not content with measuring users’ “performances” in bed (calories burnt, duration, penis circumference, number and speed of thrusts, etc), some sites even give it the power to detect characteristic signs of sexually transmitted infections.
And there you go, once the legs-in-the-air bit is over, we retrieve all the info via Bluetooth, and we can analyse ourselves, if possible while admiring our biceps in a mirror. After some torrid sex, nothing is sexier than telling your partner: “This fuck lasted 7 minutes and 35 seconds, with 238 thrusts, we’ve just burnt the calorie equivalent of half a tuna salad, and you should have that little bump monitored by a gynaecologist. Otherwise, was it cool for you?” ⏎⏎Well, in real life, the only concrete indication that it could detect a health issue is that it measures body temperature… That’s pretty limited as an STI diagnosis.⏎⏎Fortunately, at £60 a unit, this performance tracker is not just a single-use condom, but a sort of ring, reusable, which slips over the base of the penis, over the condom.
A sex doll with eighteen personalities
Realdoll, leader in the market for realistic sex dolls , presents Harmony 2.0, a love doll equipped with artificial intelligence and eighteen different personalities.
This sex robot is capable of chatting, and in particular, of giving its opinion on sexuality.
A cunnilingus by licking your iPhone
O-Cast is an app that lets you do cunnilingus remotely to a partner, or even do self-cunnilingus… by licking your iPhone.⏎⏎According to the Vice journalist who tested it, it’s a success. However, hygiene isn’t really up to scratch!
Hippy sex toys
Dildos for your chakras
At Chakrubs, there are sex toys that open the chakras. They are outrageously expensive, and the description of their features (or rather, should I say “magical powers”) is wildly far-fetched, but I must admit that I find the rose quartz dildo and the amethyst one particularly pretty.
An eco vibrator?
The Gaia Eco Vibrator by Blush Novelties claims to be the “first biodegradable sex toy”. However, it runs on batteries. Mm-hmm.
Censored fetishes
The webcam exhibition site Chaturbate suddenly decides to ban the use of Bad Dragon dildos, these pretty sex toys shaped like dragon penises and other heroic fantasy creatures.and other heroic fantasy creatures. other. heroic. fantasy. creatures. Stan. the. T.-. rex, Crash. the. Raptor and Trent. the. Triceratops.
The. dildos. Stan. the. T.-. rex. and. Trent. the. Triceratops
Meanwhile,. the. BDSM. social. network Fetlife is. removing. its. pages. related. to. blood. and. needle. fetishes,. on. the. orders. of. a. card. company.
Other. stuff…
- A. review. of. the. current. state of. virtual. reality. porn.
- Vice interviews. an. emetophile,. in. other. words,. a. vomit. fetishist.
- More from Vice: everything you ever wanted to know about theurophilia.
- Female dolphins have spiral-shaped vaginas.
- Why do we kiss on the mouth: thehistory of the kiss since antiquity.
