On the internet, as the famous Rule 34 states, porn is everywhere. Even in Minecraft, where some players turn it into scenes of blocky sex.
For those who have never heard of Minecraft, it is a video game in which the aim is to build pretty much anything you can think of, using cube-shaped blocks you’ve gathered beforehand.
And since it leaves free rein to players’ imaginations, naturally, some have tried to incorporate elements with an explicit sexual connotation. I say “tried”, because well, it still remains really blocky, like porn… We wouldn’t go so far as to fick off in front of…
A giant functional penis
A heap of pink wool blocks to make up the giant phallic member, pistons, redstone, and switches: that is the Minecraft recipe for the giant ejaculating penis.
Since Minecraft is a game for all ages, of course, there is no sperm among the materials. What is it ejaculating, then? A full herd of blocky sheep and pigs. Ah.
Minecraft and sex: a fellatio
Still in the series of robotic constructions with sexual connotations: a fellatio. I suggest we create a new Kama Sutra position to describe the lady’s posture: the seal on the prowl.
At first, I was thinking of “the seal that a bear had accidentally flattened while it thought it was sitting on a corner of the ice floe”, but that was a bit too long.
Minecraft and sex: a vaginal penetration
And just to vary the pleasures, a vaginal penetration…
With a robot penis that moves so much, if you please! And some cobwebs to serve as pubic hair or sperm.
Some porn in Minecraft
Enough with the giant sculptures, let’s now move on to sex acts between characters: a bit of Minecraft porn.
If you’ve read this far without knowing the game, you deserve a few explanations. Each player has a character, and it is possible to change the texture that makes up that character’s “skin” in order to change its appearance. In short, you can “repaint” characters so they look completely naked.
In the first episode, cows and zombies participate… But… But… Leave those poor chickens alone!
In the second, you realise that zombies know how to use a dildo…
In the third episode, you discover the gang bang in high spirits.
And in the fourth, you practise sodomy in the fields and the sixty-nine in the hut.
