We tested fake semen: the lotion “100 Shots! Bukkake Sperm”, from Rends.
This isn’t the first time a Japanese product attempting to imitate a body fluid has been tested on this blog.
First there was the Rends bath slime, a pleasantly scented substance to dilute in water, with a result that feels more like a flood of semen than mud. Then, also from Rends, the horrible Urin lotion with a chemical scent, which Méluzine had the courage to test.
The lotion “100 Shots! Bukkake Sperm” which attempts to imitate semen’s appearance, texture and smell all at once. But does it pull it off?
Fake semen packaging
Quantity
The “100 Shots! Bukkake Sperm” lotion is sold in a 200-millilitre bottle.
If there are still innocent souls here who do not know the meaning of the word bukkake, and if you are one of them, I invite you to click here to see a nice sketch (not at all safe for work, but still from Wikipedia) illustrating this practice in an encyclopaedic manner.
The product’s name implies that we are dealing with the result of 100 imaginary ejaculations. But 200 millilitres: is that a credible amount for a hundred cums? Let’s do the maths.
That gives us 2 millilitres per ejaculation.
According to Wikipedia again, the normal ejaculatory volume is between 2 and 6 millilitres. With 2 millilitres, we are exactly at the minimum sperm volume to be considered normal, but it remains scientifically plausible if we assume that only guys who ejaculate well below the average are taking part in this theoretical bukkake. Or that each of them ejaculates several times in a row… Naturally, from the second time onwards, there is likely to be less sperm coming out.
The bottle costs 22 euros. That works out at a little over 20 euro cents per ejaculation. Luckily, the participants in this bukkake are virtual, otherwise they would be seriously underpaid…
The fake sperm bottle
The bottle is cylindrical and covered in a plastic film. You can read the number 100 on it, as well as the bottle’s capacity (200mL), but the text is in Japanese.
The manager at Lovely-Vibes told me that usually, before dispatch, a label with the French translation of the product’s composition is attached. It was forgotten on the bottle he sent us for this test. But these details are also available at Lovely-Vibes, on the page dedicated to the Bukkake Sperm lotion, or on the official website of the Rends brand.
When you remove the plastic film, you realise that all the printing was on it. The fake sperm bottle is transparent, and its cap is white.
The cap screws on, allowing the whole thing to be resealed airtight… and therefore, not letting any fake sperm drip all over the place.
The fake sperm
Odour
The smell of the “100 Shots ! Bukkake Sperm” lotion does not resemble sperm at all.
It doesn’t really resemble any clearly identifiable scent, but if I have to find a scent that comes close to it, I would be inclined to say rotten banana.
You can’t say it stinks terribly. Nothing to do with the atrocious smell that Méluzine had described to us in the test of the “Urin” lotion, from the same brand. But it doesn’t really make you want to eat it either.
Taste
I don’t think this synthetic sperm can really be called “edible”. But the product description says “compatible with oral sex”, which still suggests that you can risk putting some in your mouth without any danger. So I risked tasting it, for science.
Verdict: not as bad as I would have imagined. It doesn’t taste like a rotten banana, and it doesn’t taste like a banana either, for that matter. It doesn’t really taste of much, in fact. And I’m still alive.
But in practice, this isn’t the best solution if you plan to prepare yourself a bowl of fake sperm to eat.
A few recipes for more edible fake sperm:
- Water + Maïzena
- Egg white + Sweetened condensed milk
I should mention that I haven’t (yet) tried the said recipes, found online, but if I try them, I will post photos on Objets De Plaisir.
Appearance
As for appearance, the “100 Shots ! Bukkake Sperm” lotion really pulls it off: it looks exactly like sperm, you’d be hard-pressed to tell!
But a few photos are worth more than a long speech: Lui photographed a small amount of this product, poured onto a dessert plate.
The “100 Shots !” lotion, laid flat, then upright: it doesn’t flow that quickly, it’s as viscous as sperm
It’s sticky, and pretty convincing too as a smeared trail of “sperm”.
Composition of the lotion “100 Shots ! Bukkake Sperm”
Here is the ingredient list, as it appears in the specifications for the lotion “Bukkake Sperm”: Purified water, Polyacrylic acid, Mineral oil, Sodium hyaluronate, Marine collagen, Aloe vera extract, Amino acid, Arginine, Threonine, Proline, Perfume, Food Yellow No.4 (Tartrazine), Food Yellow No.5 (Sunset Yellow FCF).
Among them, two ingredients you would not expect to find in food at all:
- polyacrylic acid: an emulsifier, notably used in cosmetic products. There was also some in the Rends “Urin” lotion.
- mineral oil, that is, a product obtained from the distillation of oil or coal… Anyway, in practice, mineral oil is on the official list of food additives, if I’m to believe Wikipedia (yuck!). It is also used in some cosmetics.
In short, I confirm: not edible. To drizzle over the cornflakes for breakfast, you will have to find something else.
This composition remains fairly “normal” for a cosmetic product; a priori, there is no danger in applying it to the skin.
Using the fake sperm
Although in English “lotion”, in addition to simply meaning “lotion”, also means “lubricant” (as a reader had pointed out to us in the comments on the Urin lotion), judging from its presentation on Rends’ official website, the “Bukkake Sperm” lotion is not specifically sold as a lubricant.
It is mainly intended for people who want to satisfy a fetish involving large amounts of sperm: to simulate a bukkake, a very abundant facial ejaculation, or simply an ejaculation, for that matter, etc… But it can also be used to easily add a few seminal special effects during a photoshoot, a porn video or a exhib’ via webcam.
Conclusion on the fake sperm “100 Shots ! Bukkake Sperm”
The good points:
- The look and consistency are fairly convincingly similar to sperm.
The bad points:
- The smell doesn’t resemble it at all.
In short: the lotion “100 Shots ! Bukkake Sperm” has the look and texture of sperm, but not the smell.
If realism in your role-play doesn’t extend to the smell, or if you’re looking for a substance to make sperm-based special effects in photos or videos, it will do the job.
Thanks to the shop Lovely Vibes, which let us test the lotion “100 Shots ! Bukkake Sperm”.
